Roman Matla

Never Wonder What If: A Conversation with Roman Matla *Robert: What does “Never Wonder What If” mean to you?* **Roman:** It became a family motto. The older I got, the more I realized that “what if” is probably the thing I’m most afraid of. I’d rather take an opportunity, take a calculated risk, and fail miserably than sit there wondering what would have happened if I had tried. When I look back at my career and personal life, there were a series of sliding-door moments. If I hadn’t taken those chances, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. I would do it all over again. *Robert: How did that become something you passed on to your kids?* **Roman:** I always tell my kids: follow your heart, follow your instinct, follow your gut. Take the opportunities life throws your way. My son is 29 and living in Canada doing what he loves as a brewer. My daughter is 16 and wants to study in Vancouver and become a film director. If that’s where her heart is taking her, I tell her to go. Otherwise, she’ll always wonder what if. *Robert: Was there one moment when that philosophy changed your life?* **Roman:** I was going through a traumatic divorce and had a prepaid scuba-diving trip to Indonesia with my best friend. At the last minute, I decided I wasn’t going. I was too busy feeling sorry for myself. My friend basically told me I was going whether I liked it or not. On that trip, I met Heather, the woman I would marry and have a daughter with. That one decision completely changed my life. *Robert: What does “wonder” mean to you?* **Roman:** Wonder is contemplation. Should I? Shouldn’t I? What if I do? What if I don’t? I was the only one in my family who picked up and left. I moved from Canada to the U.S., back to Toronto, then Hong Kong and Singapore. Wonder is this constant process of evaluating what was, what is, and what could be. It can be exciting or frightening, rewarding or punishing. But wonder keeps us young and keeps us alive. *Robert: How do you think about the decisions you’ve made?* **Roman:** Every decision you’ve ever made has brought you to where you are today. I don’t really think about good decisions and bad decisions. They were decisions. What happened five minutes ago is done. I can’t change it. I accept the decisions I make, accept the consequences, and own them. When the door opens, step through it. *Robert: What feels most important to you now?* **Roman:** Gratitude. My parents are 85, and seeing my dad in a care home has made me grateful for the health I have and more aware of how I want to live as I get older. Love and loyalty matter, too. There are hard things in life, and positivity is something you have to work on. It’s easy to get bogged down. I don’t want to spend my energy wondering what if. Try it. If you fail, that’s fine. You learn.